Mikey and My Sis

To my sister, Stephanie… I love you so much and will be with you soon.  To my nephew Stevie, you are a stud because of your mom and dad, and we will always be there for you.  To my niece Ashley, we’re there for you, too.

More reflection later.  Rest in Peace, Mikey.  For the first time in a long time, you’re free of health issues.

–RE

In January, if I recall the month correctly, Mike was diagnosed with cancer.  While this was not the beginning of the roller coaster (one could say it was much later in the ride as Mike had twice had to have kidney transplants), it was definitely the beginning of the biggest, fastest, curviest, scariest part of the ride.  Since his diagnosis, there have been a whole lot of downs and a few ups along the track.  Often, we feel as though there really isn’t a track.  Now, is one of those times.  Mike was proclaimed cancer free just a few months ago, and within two weeks of that, he was given a few days to live as more cancer…very aggressive cancer…took hold of his body.  Mike, being the champion fighter he is, defied all odds and doctors’ wisdom and got better.  Not cancer-free better, but better.  He put weight back on, started eating (and tasting food) again, regained his memory, and became the Mike of ‘ole.  Me and my OP family had feared a few months ago we would be heading to a funeral for Mike.  Now, we have a roadtrip scheduled next week to celebrate his 44th birthday.

Another drop on the roller coaster surfaced just a few days ago, and this one is steep.  Mike is now, once again, on his death bed.  While no new abnormalities show in his blood work, an infection has taken over his immune system-weak body; one that doctors don’t think antibiotics will help.  Mike refused to go to the hospital last night, and in-home hospice was arranged.  Just moments ago, my mother sent me one of the most horrible text messages I have ever received:

“He told us goodbye a while ago.  Said to tell everyone how much he loves them.  He doesn’t want to fight anymore.”

The doctors say he won’t last long, I am told.  He has defied them before.  Only God knows when Mike is going to go, but once the will to fight is gone, well, it probably won’t be long.  To go from thinking we would be celebrating a birthday with Mike (a miracle in itself) just a few days ago, to fearing I won’t ever see him again, is just mind boggling.  I want this coaster ride to end; but with Mike healthy and happy.

Michael truly is a hero to me.  He came into our lives long ago and became the father my niece Ashley needed and deserved.  He became the man who made my sister Stephanie truly happy for the first time in a long time.  He and my sister brought my 9 year-old nephew Stevie, a black belt, into this world.  He treated my wife and kids as good as he treats his own wife and kids.  He fights, fights, fights and overcomes all obstacles in his way.  He boasts about how much work he does, even sick, as compared to his coworkers.  He melted when he received an honorary black belt when Stevie earned his.   Mike is all things good, even when it seems only bad things happen.

Maybe Mike has given up on this battle; maybe he hasn’t.  Whichever it is, he is a champion and an inspiration.  I pray to God I will see him again, but I also pray to God to have mercy on him and my sister, nephew, niece, and entire family.

I love you Michael Lovato.  While I am not liking this roller coaster ride, we’re on it with you.  We got your back, just like you always have ours.

My response texts to my mother:

Oh my.  We love him, too.  Please thank him from me for being such a wonderful husband and father to my sister, Stevie and Ashley.  Please tell him that for me.  And for being a great uncle and brother-in-law.

Peace,

Relledge

Mike truly gives me a whole new perspective on life.   I sit here today, troubled with my own life events… but nothing compares to what Mike is going through.  And I know, if he can continue to fight the good fight, well hell, so can I.  And today, more than ever, I intend to.  If I learn nothing else from Mike, I learn that fighting to overcome hardships and obstacles ain’t no thing.  So I will.  And it WILL change my life.  He is fighting for life, and inspiring me to change mine.  I pray the outcome for both is a victory.  Don’t get me wrong at all… Mike’s fight is much more real and courageous than mine.  But I am going to model my remaining life, no matter how long that is, to be like his.

I continue to pray for Mike and my sister and family,  I pray for comfort and I pray for him to defeat this big, bully “Cancer”.  I know he can.  And I know my sister can remain strong.  And further, I know I can learn from them both, and change my life accordingly.

Love to and prayers for Mike, Stephanie, Stevie, and Ashely, along with the rest of my family….

–RElledge

Stevie, Mike, Grandpa, Stephanie and Ashley

My sister, Stephanie, is such a strong woman, or at least she shows herself to be.  I do not know how she remains so strong with all she and Mike have been through.  It is amazing, to say the least.  I am so proud of her for demonstrating such strength and courage in the face of adversity, but I know on the inside, she is weeping like the rest of us.  I’m sure she has her private moments where she let’s it out.  That is good…she needs to.  I know she is trying to be so strong for my nephew, Stephen, and my niece Ashley, both of whom are also showing amazing strength.  My thoughts and prayers are nearly exclusively with them all.

Mike entering our family over 12 years ago was truly a blessing for my sister and my niece.  Mike became the father figure Ashley so desperately needed and longed for.  While he is, on paper, only her step-father, it does not ever feel that way.  He loves Ashley as if she was his very own.  And Ashley needed that.  So did Stephanie.  Then, thanks to Mike, we were blessed with the addition of Stephen some 10 years ago.  What an awesome, strong young man he is.  I can only imagine what is going on in his head.  He absolutely idolizes his father (and rightfully so).  I know Stevie will be the same fighter Mike is, I just pray he doesn’t face a fraction of the battles his father has.  I hope his battles will be the fun kind, as he continues his pursuit of his black belt.

I feel helpless sitting here in Overland Park while my big sister is going through this; but that’s what she wants.  She told me on the phone she wants me to stay here–she doesn’t want me to remember Mike how he is right now.  She wants me to remember him as the champion fighter he has always been.  And I will, no doubt.  This is just another sign of how strong my sister is.  I want to be there for her, but she wants to be there exclusively for Mike.  I respect and understand that.

Cancer is the most hideous disease I can ever imagine.  It takes far too many people, far too soon.  I pray for the miracle that will allow Mike to win this fight.  He is definitely up against the ultimate opponent.  While the odds may be against him right now, I know that I, for one, don’t count him out.

Sending love to and prayers for Mike, Stephanie, Stevie and Ashley, along with the rest of my family,

–RElledge

Braelyn turns three next Sunday, and she’s so excited for her Minnie Mouse birthday party next Saturday. She picked out the cake and everything. Crazy how much she has grown over the past year, as shown in her Christmas pictures from Dec. 24th 2009 and 2010.

Braelyn also just started preschool. She went for a practice day last Thursday, and Monday will be her first official day of pre-school. That and her weekly gymnastics on Saturday are two of her favorite things… aside from any toy that Brody happens to be playing with.

Speaking of the Brodster… he turned one in September and is quite the character. He, too, has grown considerably.

Brody begins toddler school on Monday, at the same place Braelyn goes (La Petite Academy). He loved the place last Thursday when we dropped Braelyn off… so much he got mad when he had to leave. So thankfully, both kids should do well in their new school.

Rebecca is loving her job at Treo Solutions, though she travels to Albany, NY a bit more than I enjoy. I do not think I am cut out to be the primary care giver. Rebecca is awesome at it… I just am “OK” at it. For 2011, Rebecca has vowed to not be grumpy (I give it < 1 day till she breaks that one), to give up soda (Diet Coke has been her cocaine), and until we go to Maui (January 17!!!), she vows she isn’t drinking a drop of alcohol. Best of luck to her as she takes on these three monumental tasks at once. She is one tough cookie, though, so I bet she gets 2 of the 3.

Spencer is doing real well in his junior year at Blue Valley Northwest High School. He has had a tough past year, with two friends taking their own life. He is a strong kid, and has pulled through. He really is turning into a fine young man. Says his mom is already going through a state of depression, trying to deal with Spencer being out of high school in a year and a half. Something tells me it’s more Spencer than his mom, at least at this point. Something else tells me Spencer will be around a year or two after he graduates… time will tell.

The big dawg Hoover is doing well. Still a bit gimp from his bad legs, but he is handling quite well. He has even been going up and down the stairs to the basement quite a bit of late. He’s a great dog… and just over 5 years old. We will have had Hoover for 5 years in just a few weeks.

As for me, I’m doing well. Lost about 12 pounds in the past month, but not completely by diet and exercise changes… while I have been going to the gym a bit more of late, I also took back to my old bad habit of chewing which I gave up on January 1st of last year. It really surpresses my appetite. I made it to labor day weekend without one, but only had a few while at the Gorge. Then I resumed on a regular basis the last week of November. I intend to quit it again right after Maui. I need to keep up the weight loss until then! Work is going strong and keeping me busy… a good thing.

Resolutions for me for 2011? Not much, really. Will quit chewing again after Maui. Still don’t drink pop (gave that up last NYE). I guess just keep going to the gym and eat better. Be healthy. Yep… sounds familiar, I am sure.

Oh, the other thing… as of today, I have seperated my twitter and facebook accounts, and do not intend to post status updates via either. I have grown tired of that, and realize it’s pretty much a big waste of time. As such, more about me and my happenings will be found right here on RyanElledge.com. Oh, and twitter will become more of a work thing for me. Less personal, more professional. That’s the plan, anyway.

To any of you who have stumbled upon this, in whatever manner you came, thanks for stopping by and reading. I hope you have a tremendous 2011. It will be quite a year… and one without my beloved Dave Matthews Band since they are taking the year off. Ugggghhhhhhh.

Peace,

RE

In just a few hours, Rebecca, Braelyn, Brody, Spencer and I will head to a church service and then home to open up presents. While this will be Brody’s first Christmas, I really think this is going to be the first Christmas where Braelyn will just absolutely have a blast opening all of the presents, or “pretties” as she likes to call them. She understands this Santa Claus guy this year, but doesn’t quite realize that Santa is coming tonight to bring her plenty of toys and clothes. I know when she sat on Santa’s lap, when asked what she wanted for Christmas she whispered to him “can-e and toyz”. I wish I could have been there, but it happened while I was out-of-town for work. Anyway, tonight is going to be a blast, and then she’ll wake up and have another gift or two that Santa might put under the tree for her.

Brody will get his share of goodies, too… he just won’t really comprehend since he’s only a few months old. Next year I am sure he’ll grasp it, as I am quite certain his big sister Braelyn will explain it all to him once the tree goes up next November.

The biggest question I have is will Santa be good to Spencer? I suspect so, since Spencer has been, for the most part, a good little boy this year.

It will most definitely be a quieter Christmas… just the 5 of us, plus Hoover and Sophie. It will be sad not to experience it all with my family or Rebeccas, but that is what living in different parts of the country do for you. Rebecca’s family is scheduled to come up tomorrow for Christmas lunch, but those plans are in jeopardy as Old Man Winter plans on making an appearance tonight. Actually as I sit here in my home office and look out the window, I notice the wind has picked up (making me feel like I am back in Casper), it is drizzling rain and approaching freezing. Supposed to turn to snow after 5pm tonight, and they say we’ll get anywhere from 2 to 6 inches of snow. It will, most likely, be a White Christmas. They say that there hasn’t been a Christmas Day with 1″ or more of snow accumulation since 1969 here in the Kansas City area. That is crazy to think about. Sure there has been snow on the ground on Christmas Day, but actual snow fall on Christmas Day, not since 1969.

Crazy to think that this year is almost done… and a decade, as well. Just think, ten years ago we were all wondering if the world was coming to an end with the Y2K issue. Now, the same thoughts go through our heads, but it’s the government we need to worry about, not some potential computer hiccup. Yep, thanks to Santa Reid, a crazy version of health care reform passed vote this morning. I still hold out hope that the Senate and the House won’t get a compromise, but seems likely they will. Funny to think that Santa Reid has clauses (yes, pun intended) in there to prevent any future congress from removing parts of his bill. At least we can all be thankful that this congress knows so much more than all others before them and that will come after them. Thankfully, I am sure the courts will probably not allow some of this garbage.

Man, I guess it’s sad that I can’t even post a Merry Christmas blog without going down the PoliTICKS me OFF route. Sorry folks.

Anyway, to you and yours, have a Merry Christmas. I hope the real Santa Claus brings you everything you want.

Peace.

–RElledge

On Thursday and Friday, we enjoyed two Dave & Tim shows. This was the first time Rebecca has experienced Dave & Tim… and the two nights were awesome. We heard Angel from Montgomery, which was the first time Dave or the full band has performed it since August of 2001. That was a nice surprise. On her birthday, we heard Rebecca’s two most-desired Dave songs: Crash and Satellite. Yep, she walked down the isle to the riff of Satellite when we got married, and we enjoyed our first dance as a married couple to none-other-than Crash. We also heard a new, never-before-played song by Dave: After The Gold Rush. Dave played it on piano. When he went over to the piano, I was certain he was playing Out of My Hands, but no… he had a surprise for us! It was awesome. Dave said he screwed it up, but since it was the first time ever playing it, who was to know? The concerts were definitely great. I wish I had been at the Saturday concert, as I would have gotten to hear A Christmas Song, which was the one song I really wanted to hear. Oh well, we enjoed Mystere, the Cirque De Sole show. Second time I have seen it, but the first for Rebecca and Eli & Heather Bowman, our friends who joined us on the trip.

Ok, since I am often asked, that makes my 68th Dave show. It may actually be a couple more than that, but I think I have captured all that I can remember on DMBAlmanac.com’s website. Click that link if you want to see the exciting stats of my shows.

On Thursday, we had a wonderful… and I mean WONDERFUL… dinner at Prime, a steakhouse in the Bellagio. Our table overlooked the fountains. While expensive, it was a great meal no doubt.

Eli told me on the trip that they say you should walk 10,000 steps a day for health. I am healthy for the next few months based on our excursions in the bitter air in Vegas.

Well, that’s enough for now. Happy Holidays… and by that I mean Merry Christmas… to ya’ll out there (sorry, Obama… America is a Christian country, no matter what you say). Excited to see what changes 2010 will bring… 2009 has been a somewhat up-and-down year for me. Definitely up from a family perspective, mixed on the work side of things, and down on some other items which aren’t exactly things I want to post about. I am just thankful I have a great job in this economy, have the most awesome baby girl in the world, was blessed with the birth of my son this year, my step-son is doing better in school and is an awesome big brother to Braelyn and Brody, and my wife is the best (wrinkles and all!). I am also blessed to have such a great family and for all of my friends.

Here’s to a great 2010, including another “change” in Washington DC that will hopefully offset some of the change we’re seeing from the current mess in the corrupt capitol.

Peace.

I think a new change and a new hope will sweep the 2010 elections.

Our political system is corrupt and embarassing. Yep, I think that sums it up quite nicely.

Tomorrow, lil man Brody will fly on his first airplane ride. At just over two months, he, along with Rebecca, Braelyn, Spencer and I, will embark for windy Wyoming. I looked at the forecast for Casper for next week and the temperatures look like they will be okay, but I presume the small smudgy icon on a few of those days indicates wind. Oh, how I sure hope so! I do miss the wind. Anyway, it will be nice to get to introduce Brody to the rest of my family. He has met his grandma and grandpa, but now he is in for a complete treat… one full week of constant attention by his aunts Stephanie and Wendy, his uncles Mike and Tony, his cousins Brandon, Nate, Ashley, Courtney, Keegan and Stephen, and his great grandma Dorothy. Of course, g’ma and g’pa will probably give him a little attention, too. I must remind the Elledges, Lovatos and Lechers, though, that Princess Braelyn will be arriving as well, and should be showered with attention as well. Something tells me that won’t be an issue.

We will be in Casper Sunday afternoon through the following Saturday, and I do look forward to a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner with the family. Holidays are great. Just hope the plane rides with two under two’s will go ok. I suspect the rest of the passengers will hope the same….

Busy day today. Need to attempt to finish hanging the Christmas lights [holy cow, did I say Christmas instead of holiday? How dare me....] Squeeze in an abbreivated guitar lesson at 12:30 instead of a full hour at 2pm, as at 2pm we will be hauling some 300+ pounds of custom built baseball lockers up to the lil man’s room. Hopefully we can just strap them onto Hoover’s back and he can do most of the work for us. I am anxious to see the lockers… they have been being built for six or seven weeks now by a guy I found on Craigslist. I hope they look as good in his room as they do in my head….

After that excitement I will probably need to do a little packing [right... that will probably take place 30 minutes before we leave tomorrow]. We shipped a bunch of stuff to Casper earlier this week for $14, box included, so we don’t have to check much in the way of luggage at $50 per bag round trip. Oh, Southwest Airlines, why don’t you fly to Casper?

Well, my early morning of blogging is coming to an end. I need to go refill my coffee cup. Rebecca and the kids are still in bed… I am only up because I couldn’t get back to sleep and I wanted to check in on a few auctions on Swoopo.com. If you haven’t been to Swoopo.com, you should check it out. It is an awesome concept. I wish I had thought of it…

Have a great Thanksgiving, all.

Brody’s room is coming along… the walls are painted, quite a bit of decor has arrived (but has not been hung). The new carpet is in, the crib, chainging table and rocking chair have been relocated from Braelyn’s room to Brody’s. I have a guy who is going to build me some cool wooden lockers for his room, and those won’t be done for about 4-6 weeks, but that will be the finishing touch. Now, if I could just get his baseball ceiling light working… the fan works, but not the lite. Someday I will master being an electrician. That someday will probably be right after my pops arrives mid week.

Yep, mom and dad are heading here from Casper to be here to welcome Brody into the world. Will be great to have them around to help out. I know Braelyn will love it… though she absolutely loves visiting with ba-pa and grandma on the computer. Webcams make family a lot closer, that’s for sure. And anytime I am on my laptop, Braelyn comes running to talk to ba-pa.

Braelyn is quite the girl. I am nervous as to how she is going to react to having a new brother… one that will inevitably take much attention. There is a 6 month old at her daycare who she isn’t too fond of. I think she will be a great big sister. I know in about 2 years, we’ll love the fact that Brae and Bro are so close in age. Of course, daddy and Spencer will spend a bunch of time with Braelyn while mom is feeding Brody. Ah, the sleepless nights are approaching quickly!

So it was nice to have some football to watch. I did ok with my picks for week one, though I must admit I did not pick the Broncos. Don’t get me wrong, I am ecstatic that they won… I just didn’t anticipate it. Was awesome to see the Chiefs lose again… that’s pretty normal though.

Quickie on politics… I am just so amazed at how many people pretend they know what the health care bill(s) being pushed are really about and what they will do. How could any of us really know how good or how bad the bills are… even our Congress hasn’t even read them! What I do know is I am very opposed to the government running anything more. They fail, fail, fail in everything they put their magical touch on. And I don’t like businesses being punished, nor individuals being mandated to. I love the legacy concept of America being a free-country. Those days are behind us all, I must say.

I do have to give major kudos to President Obama for his 9/11 speech. I was actually quite amazed at it, really. The speech was very thoughtful and sincere and well delivered (thanks, teleprompter!) The amazing part to me was the religious overtures that Obama gave during his speech. He cited scripture and referenced God. Oh, how that must just irritate the left. Oh well, I bag on the buy enough so may as well give him props when he deserves it.

Speaking of 9/11, that is my mom’s birthday. Of course I called her and wished her a happy birthday, but let this be my public proclamation of such, and that I am so thankful for my mother (and my whole family). She is a tremendous woman who cares so much about her family and friends. I pray my daughter will grow up to be the same way. I am thrilled that Rebecca suggested that Brody’s middle name be Carlen, my mother’s maiden name.

Oh, and 9/12 was the Biggest B’s birthday… my nephew Brandon turned 20! Can’t believe it… I remember vividly holding him and dancing to Lollipop when he was younger than Braelyn is today… what a great kid. He’s off traveling in Europe right now for the next week. I pray he has a wonderful, safe time over there. What a great kid, er, young man he is.

Well, Hoover is laying at my feet snoring, Braelyn has been in (and out) of bed for the past two hours (mostly in, but she did tumble out of her bed tonight), and Spencer and Rebecca just ventured to bed themselves. I guess that is my clue it is time for me to do the same. After a shower, though… I am FILTHY from finishing my firepit today. Will have to throw some pictures up in my gallery sometime in the next few days. Pretty happy with how it turned out. It isn’t perfect, but for never having done anything like it before, I must say I did a pretty damn good job.

Peace to all ya’ll out there in cyber land. Wish us well as we bring another Elledge into the world…

–RElledge